Grade A Certified

Lyfe Explains the Facts of Life (by J. Tinsley)

Posted by Mr. Put On on May 25, 2010

If I had a dollar for anytime a female I knew uttered the now classic phrase, “Men N#ggas ain’t sh#t,” I, too, could sit court side and trip referees. Whether it’s true or not is an entirely different argument and one I’m not truly ready to tackle at the moment. But Lyfe Jennings sure as hell is.

His newest song, “Statistics,” is one of those records I’ll let my daughter hear (if I have one) years down the road. For every young lady, and young at heart for you cougars out there, the inmate turned entertainer runs off a few statistical facts. Here’s a preview. Keep in mind, these are Lyfe’s findings, not mine.

1) 25% of all men are unstable.
2) 25% of all men cannot remain faithful.
3) 30% of all men don’t mean what they say.
4) 10% don’t remain, and 20 happen to be gay.

Math serving correctly, that’s a whooping total of 90% of men being worthless. Hold on, there are still lessons to be taught sang as well.

1) Don’t be a booty call.
2) If a guy’s in a relationship and cheats on his girl with you, then chances are he’ll do it to you to.
3) Tell him that you’re celibate.
4) Be the person you want to find.

I doubt these findings will land Lyfe on Oprah’s couch anytime soon, but it will become the anthem for every scorned female nationwide. Especially with the “single black women” topic being so hotly contested recently. At the risk of sounding ignorant, however, a “booty call” (people still say that?) is a good arrangement if the guidelines are settled upon by both parties beforehand. Everyone’s had one at some point and chances are you miss the hell out that person, too. At times, of course.

In all seriousness, the underlying message is a positive one with some brutally honest bars sprinkled throughout the record (see rule #2). I’ll just be referring to Lyfe as the “Steve Harvey of R&B” for foreseeable future though. Jennings’ fourth album, I Still Believe, hits stores later this year.

DL: Lyfe Jennings – “Statistics”


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